


Not the Same

by magizoologist



Series: Bullet Blurbs [3]
Category: Forbrydelsen | The Killing, The Killing
Genre: Confessions, F/F, Love Confessions, Multi, Post Goldie, Post Kallie, Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder - PTSD, Season 3
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-07-01
Updated: 2017-07-01
Packaged: 2018-11-21 20:47:41
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Rape/Non-Con, Underage
Chapters: 1
Words: 649
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11365350
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/magizoologist/pseuds/magizoologist
Summary: After Bullet goes looking for Kallie on her own, diving head first into a bad situation, she's not the same. And Sunny can't help but notice. The two have come to know each other quite well, and Sunny has a hunch that something bad happened to Bullet. When Bullet doesn't want to talk about it, Sunny doesn't know what to do. So she confesses.





	Not the Same

**Author's Note:**

> This blurb alludes to rape and may be triggering. It's not an appropriate response to the situation, but it is the characters' response...

I took a deep breath before saying anything. I couldn’t look at her, not for anything that she’d done but for what he’d done to her. “What Goldie did to you--”

“Goldie didn’t do nothin’ to me!” Bullet raised her voice at me. It was the first time her anger had been directed at me. She’d yelled at me before, but then I knew she was upset with someone else. This time, though, I could feel the rage in her voice. Rage meant only for me.

I should’ve dropped it, but I’ve never been good at letting go. “Oh, shut the  _ fuck  _ up, Bullet,” I yelled over her and cut her off before she could start to protest again. “You don’t gotta talk about it, but you damn well ain’t gonna lie to me, B.” I flinched at the hostility in my own voice, the accent that made me sound like my grandma back home. I never wanted to be like her, be that hateful person that scared me senseless. 

I was shaking, I wasn’t sure if it was rage or if it was fear. Probably some combination of the two, mixed with a feeling of grief. She didn’t have a smart-ass response for that; she hadn’t ever seen me snap like this either. She thought I was made of sunshine - maybe I was, but sunshine was full of radiation and fueled by fire.

“ _Now_.” I tried to soften my tone, but I’m not certain it worked. “What Goldie did--”

“I don’t wanna talk about it.” This time she didn’t have an ounce of anger. It was resignation, plain and simple. It hurt to see her that way, to hear her sound so defeated. She was always so indignant. I knew how to deal with indignance. This was all new.

“No one’s askin' you to talk,” my voice had softened almost entirely, but the words still came out harsh. “But I can see it. You’re not the same, B. But you’re okay. Just, listen to me?” It was a plea even if it didn’t quite sound like one. I needed her to hear what I had to say. I needed her to know.

I took a step toward her. When she didn’t flinch or respond, I nearly whispered, in total desperation, “Please?”

I was crying, but I didn’t deserve to be crying. After what had happened to her and how I’d reacted, I didn’t deserve to feel the way I did or act the way I was. I didn’t deserve it, but it was there anyway. Just waiting to be spoken.

“Bullet,” her name was a breath. I didn’t know if she could hear me. I didn’t know if she was listening. “Bullet, I love you. I do. Fuck, I love you so much.” I looked down at the cement and took a step back, trying to give her some space, room to breathe. “I just--I wanted to make sure you knew that. No matter what he did or didn’t do to you, nothin’s gonna change that. Nothin’.” I swiped at my eyes, wiping away tears and taking a few deep breaths. “I love you, Bullet.”

Silence.

“ _I have faith in you_ ,” I mouthed the words, not daring to bring them to life.

I stepped back once more, certain I was crowding her and making her claustrophobic. I was having trouble breathing myself. But when I looked up, she was right in front of me. I gasped, stumbling back and losing balance. I fell, but quickly pushed myself back to my feet to be standing in front of her.

I couldn’t help it, I laughed at myself. She smiled, and leaned in. I nearly fell again, but caught myself as her lips met mine. She pulled me closer, and I could feel my heart in my throat.

It was perfect. Until I tasted the tears on her lips.

**Author's Note:**

> Feel free to leave comments, thank you for reading  
> (Having never been through this exact experience myself, I can only provide my own lens to the situation. This is based on an immediate emotional response, and is not representative of any real life interaction. I am aware that you may feel this reaction is not in character for Bullet, but I think her emotional nature might make her react in this way. Regardless, this is simply a work of fiction. Thank you for all your comments, observations, and thoughts.)


End file.
